Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Day Sixteen Post Op

I talked to Tim's father's wife last night around midnight, and she really helped me put things into perspective and really "cheered" me up. in a sense. (I'm not cheery, just not as upset.) Charlie and I got some sleep, but he woke up so hungry, and because of his procedures today, he couldn't eat past midnight, but could have Pedialyte before 6AM. Needless to say, he does not like Pedialyte and didn't have more than half an ounce. Poor baby. He was scheduled to go for 8AM, but they are busy so they put a hold on it, and he can't eat still.  I really hope all is well, and we can go home tomorrow. That would be fantastic. They didn't give him his Lasix and aspirin this morning because he is having the broviac removed and due to the fact he hasn't eaten since 9PM last night.
They just came in an told me that they are rescheduling until tomorrow. Ughhhh. I just can't even deal with being in this hospital anymore. I just want to go home already, and I'm sure this place is taking its toll on Charlie as well. I will update later or tomorrow since it looks like today is going to be ANOTHER quiet, boring, lonely day.

Charlie's broviac removal and echo is scheduled for 11AM tomorrow. They said the reason it didn't happen today is because there was supposed to be an IV in place, paperwork wasn't filled out correctly (not by me), and they never requested blood to be put on hold for him. I was so upset. Apparently, there was no chance of us going home tomorrow anyway since he is still on the ativan, and they will not send us home while he is on that. We are looking at Sunday, if all works out well. They will wean him on it today and Friday, and hopefully, it will be all set. He has an IV now, and I was told everything is in place so he will DEFINITELY be going for the removal tomorrow. He has been pretty quiet today. Nothing new. He isjust eating and sleeping and watching some TV.
I have been so sick to my stomach. I am so stressed out, I have had a headache all day. I haven't really eaten. I just want to go home. I miss Addison. I am still unbelievably annoyed with Timithy. I spoke to him for a whole two minutes today, and of course, he had to go. Once again, he is the one person I depend on to comfort me and be supportive of me through all of this, and he is the one person who is just too absorbed in his own things right now. It bothers me immensely because I just want him to understand what I am going through and how I am feeling, and it's like he has no desire to. I feel so isolated up here. He doesn't call me, text me, or anything. It's quite upsetting. It makes me feel abandoned and even lonelier. I don't know what to do anymore. What can I do except sit here and cry and be alone, day in and day out.
I went to the support group here today, and I was the only one to show up. (Talk about feeling even more alone.) Halfway through, a woman showed up, and we chatted for a little, but I can't shake this awful feeling.
I will update tomorrow since tonight will be pretty boring.

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